Helen's Practical Advice to Andrea

Helen got a shocking phone call from her sister Andrea in Utica. A real bomb shell. Her husband Thomas was having an affair. How did she know? Thomas was having that far away look in his eyes, much more often than ever before. And he was coming home later in the evening. His lovemaking advances were much less frequent. And here was the clincher.

“For the past few weeks he’s been calling on the phone quite a lot, to say he would be working late at the office, to get the tax situation straightened out. On one of those nights, I called the office to ask him to stop at the drug store to pick up little Pattie’s prescription. No answer, and it was another two hours before he got home.”

Helen asked her younger sister a few questions. “Do you and Tom do a lot of things together? Do you get along pretty well in general? Do you have a lot of disagreements?” The answers were all the same. Andrea and Tom were very close in every possible way, and they had very few serious disagreements. Practically none, in fact. Finally, Helen asked the crucial question. It was a hard thing to ask, but she had traveled a long way, and wanted to help find an answer. Do you look forward to sex? Do you still find it exciting and satisfying? Does Tom seem happy and contented after your lovemaking sessions?”

Andrea was slow to answer, and a little embarrassed. But she finally did answer those questions, and Helen knew right then and there, that she had hit upon the answer. Andrea had become preoccupied with the kids and with her volunteer work, and her social contacts. She had been spending a lot of time on the phone with her friends while Tom would be reading the paper or watching the football game.

Helen decided to take the bull by the horns, and say what was on her mind.

“Andrea, one of the compelling things that make for a happy marriage, is lovemaking: sexual gratification. This may sound crude, but it’s a fact of life.Nature implanted us with this compelling desire, to perpetuate our species. And in fact, every living species, not just the birds and the bees. This is a healthy and necessary longing that we all have. The only difference is that the human species has evolved to the extent that this need for physical love transcends the need for reproduction. This urge fades away with other living plants and animals, but with us it remains until we are very old.”

“But now I’m straying from the main subject. Sexual attraction is almost in direct proportion to perceived wanting from a person’s spouse or lover. So what does that mean? It means that if Thomas senses that you have an overwhelming desire to have him make love to you, it’s almost certain that this will give him a compelling desire to do just that. On the other hand, if he feels that his intimacy with you is being merely allowed, his interest will surely fade away.”

“Let me give you some examples. Or rather, ask you some personal questions. When was the last time you looked into his eyes with amischievous
smile, and asked him what he would rather be doing, instead of watching TV? Did you ever tell him about your erotic dream that involved you and him making hot and passionate love? Did you ever tell him how crazy and wild you feel when his fingers wiggle around and massage your G spot? Did you ever beg him to caress your nipples, and sigh with ecstasy when he did?

Even if it’s a little white lie, that’s OK. It’s almost certain to get his hormones buzzing. Nature made him that way. When’s the last time you whispered to him about some of the ways of foreplay that you’ve dreamed about? He doesn’t really want to be rushed into a quick orgasm. Make him feel that you can’t get enough of him, and soon he’ll be feeling that wayhimself. That he just can’t get enough of you. “

“The sexual gratification for both of you will be beyond anything you’ve felt in a very long time. You’ll find that the little picky things that you both argue about, will become insignificant to both you and him. They’ll tend to disappear. Or else they’ll be quickly settled”

‘And I’m going to predict that if you just try this, a lot of good things will happen. Your lovemaking with Thomas will become a real joy and pleasure for you, as well as for him. It will no longer seem to you like a routine chore. And the so-called affair will very quickly cease to exist”.

Helen could tell from Eileen’s reaction that she was getting through to her. She was dropped off at the airport the next day, and went back to Jack
and the kids. About two weeks later, Helen called and asked about how everybody was, but skipped the obvious question. She didn’t even have to ask. Andrea had a happy lilt in her voice and said everything is justfine. “How’s Thomas?” “He’s fantastic."

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