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    Improving Your Self Confidence
    Author: Lee Dobbins
    Website:
    Added: Sun, 01 Jan 2006 01:00:00 -0500
    Category: Coaching
    Printable version | Email | Bookmark

    When you project self confidence you get further ahead. You feel better about yourself and people like to be around you. More opportunities open up for you naturally. Not everyone is “born” with self confidence but even if your confidence is low, there are some things you can do to improve on it.

    The first thing you must do to gain self confidence is to accept and love yourself. Remember that no one is perfect so don’t beat yourself up over a few flaws. You must accept them and think about all your great qualities. Doing so will free your mind of a heavy baggage of unnecessary worries and you will instantly feel light and cheerful.

    Another thing you must do is to participate in activities that you enjoy. When is that last time you enjoyed a walk outdoors or some activity you loved to do when you were young? This might seem like a little thing but these simple things have the power to add on to build great confidence and fulfillment. Take some time each day to do something you enjoy and reflect on your special abilities. Since you enjoy doing that activity, it means that you have all the aptitude and intelligence necessary to do the job effortlessly even though you may not realize it.

    Setting and achieving your goals is another step in gaining self confidence but many people set unrealistic goals and when they fail to achieve them it undermines their self confidence. Even if you have a lofty goal, break it down into smaller steps. Then you can check off each completed step as a goal successfully reached and be that much closer to your ultimate “big” goal.

    The people you associate with play an important role in your self confidence. If your loved ones are always criticizing you then this will do nothing for your self confidence. You need to stay away from people like this and gravitate towards those with a positive outlook that will support you. This will do wonders for your self confidence!

    In addition to listening to what others have to say about you, you need to be aware of your own self talk. Do you think “I could never do that?” or “I didn’t do a good job” a lot? You must change this type of self talk to be more positive. How about ‘I did my best and it came out pretty good” instead? You need to realize that you are a unique individual with your own special place in the world and realize you can succeed at any reasonable task and can handle lifes daily tests. The key is to not become so over confident that you stop listening to others and think that you know everything. Taking in others perceptions, criticisms and praise and filtering it so that you only take in what will help make you better will help in your self confidence in the long run.

    Your self picture is what feeds your self confidence and this needs constant monitoring and care. Don’t underestimate yourself and guard against letting feelings of inferiority in. Always shoot for your best and most reasonable goals and keep your strong points in mind.

    A good practice is to write down some short term and long term plans. Where would you like to be 5 years from now? Break that down into smaller steps and go about executing your plan. Also write down all your strong points - what you do well and the things you usually receive compliments on. At the same time, write down a few things you would like to work on improving. Have a self image of yourself as confident and proceed to act this way even when you are not feeling confident, this will go a long way in adjusting your attitude. When negative feelings or feelings of inferiority creep in, simply push them away. If they insist on coming back, set them aside to think about at the end of the day and go on with your business using your confident attitude.

    Taking responsibility for your thoughts and actions and practicing self confidence will go a long way toward improving your self confidence helping you reach your goals and enriching your life!

    View all Lee Dobbins's articles


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