Fitting a Square Peg Into a
You have heard the phrase that you can't fit a
square peg into a round hole. A simply observation would prove that statement
incorrect. You can fit a square peg into a round hole. You can also fit a round
peg into a square hole, but why would you want to?
There are those who would try simply because they can. And there are those who
are square pegs that like the looks of a round hole and would try to fit.
Although they all fit; they do not fit uniformly in the hole.
Everyone has a shape and a destiny. In other words, no matter what shape you
were created in; you have a place to fit. You begin your journey as a
round/square peg or some other shape and your journey begins in a world that is
in conflict with its shapes. There are many who are entrenched in assimilation.
They figure that everyone should have the same shape as them, and that they
should fit into the same shape hole. Thankfully this is not natural, and life
has seen fit to motivate some shapes to move outside the box. We generally don't
like people who do not follow the rules, but without them nothing would change.
It is the rule breakers that motivate society to change it rules. It was a rule
breaker that discovered the world was not actually flat. So if you are a round
peg and it serves you to fit into a square hole; then you should do it. But what
about the shape that is having issues or problems fitting in?
If you find that your life is in constant turmoil or struggle it is probably
because you are trying to fit into a different shaped hole. In truth if you are
a round peg, it would be your life's purpose or destiny to find the place you
most easily fit into. There is no struggle when you are in harmony with what
Because you are an aspect of spirit and it is spirit that has manifested itself
into the physical world as one shape or the other; it is natural for you to take
the path of least resistance. This is known to you before you come to this
world. Because you have freedom to choose (unconditional love), you choose how
you will find the best fit.
For many of us, our problems begin with our parents and with others who have
power over us. Many will expect you to live within their own shape or
limitations. You're in my house, this is the way it is and you will follow the
rules and fit in. You are now a round peg trapped in a square box. You may fit,
but it is not who or what you are.
You may get this same attitude with your siblings, you school structure and
mates. Local laws and regional culture will also try to shape you into something
that they can accept.
During this period of growth there are many who are trying to reshape you and
you are left with only three choices. You can try to fit in, you can go along
with a life of constant struggle and live with the pressure or you can free
yourself and follow your destiny.
By the time you are mature enough to make up your own mind, you may find
yourself hopelessly entrenched in a process that has created a life of struggle
and unhappiness. You have bought into what they have told you and are feeling
inadequate, left out, or damaged. You are far removed from your destiny and
life's purpose has eluded you.
It is very easy to determine when you are not moving along a natural path - it's
Now sometimes you can fool yourself. Things may be going along just fine and you
have been accepted by family, friends, and society. However, beneath your
rounded or square exterior there is conflict, turmoil, and struggle. Something
is always missing. That feeling will never go away no matter how successful you
think you are. No matter how popular or desired you may be. A round peg in a
square hole leaves spaces around it which are not filled. You will always feel
those spaces and feel incomplete; something will always be missing.
The good news is that even being a misfit has its advantages, and you will not
always be like this. Life evolves and so will you. If not in this lifetime; it
will be the next. Even better is that you have the choice at any time to change.
Change will come when you let go of all the thoughts you have about fitting in
at all. And after the age of thirty; this becomes an even greater challenge. The
younger you are, the easier it is.
More than likely you will lose everything that you thought you wanted, your
friends, your job, your lifestyle and more. The good news is that you will
become something much greater than you could ever imagine, and you will never be
happier. There is no greater feeling than being free. It is not natural for life
to be boxed, and in the end it cannot. Life always finds a way. In the moment
that you finally discover that you have not fit in and it is not what you want;
you will begin the journey to freedom.
You must know that your family, friends and society are not your enemies. Fear
and your own thoughts about change are your enemies. The unknown is scary, but
in truth a life lived outside your destiny is even scarier. Walking someone
else's path gives you little opportunity for you to be your natural self, as
good or bad as that may seem. In reality, good or bad does not work for you.
What works for you is determined by your choices. As a round peg, you will
always make round peg choices and the choices will always work. When you make
square choices, there will always be some extra space that just doesn't fit into
your shape (purpose).
I have always been a round peg living is a square world. When I started writing
nine years ago, I had to let go of everything just to let the writing come
through. I gave up a successful business, found a way out and lived virtually on
the street for over a year. I am 60 years old and I am still filtering out the
limiting demands of society and my own thoughts which still challenge me in my
current day-to-day life. I constantly question the significance or fit of what I
I have no friends and have alienated myself from my families. I am semi retired
and work part time at a job that is constantly challenging me to conform to
standards which are inconsistent with how I see myself. Although I have
discovered my shape, I have not found my place to fit. In fact I am a misfit
(eccentric). I do not say this with regret or condemnation but with a sense of
purpose and a profound desire to follow my destiny. For those who may not accept
me or my writing, they offer me encouragement because it is a sign that I am
still continuing along my chosen path and I am different from them.
I am not alone in my experience, and there are many others who are like me. By
our very nature as misfits (eccentrics), we will not even find a fit amongst
ourselves. This does not excuse us from being involved or associated with
people. People bring an awareness of self (myself) and we are defined by the
existence of others. We will always be relative to someone else. Spiritually, I
don't think it is healthy not to share with others. Life always seeks to
discover and recognize other life.
What I do, I do for myself first, because it is within me to do so. By doing so,
I also give back to others who need to hear what I have to say. If you were to
look at my website and read my articles on the internet or read my books, you
would discover that I have an abundance of things to say. By creating this
abundance, I can afford to give it away. So it is the right hand shaking hands
with the left.
For all those out there who see themselves as different - embrace it. Be unique
and special. Continue to discover your shape and look for your fit. Live your
life with purpose and know that it is your destiny, and your life will be
defined by the purpose that you give it, and not by the expectation of others.
Allow others the same freedom to be themselves, but never allow anyone who may
be cloaked in good deeds to determine who you are or what your destiny is. A
life purpose driven is well served no matter what anyone thinks.
Live well in abundance!
Roy is a resident of British Columbia, Canada. An international published author, a student of NLP, spiritual philosopher, New Age Light Worker, Teacher and Phenomenologist. Roy's books and articles are thought provoking, and designed to empower your imagination.
Review Roy's new book at: http://www.yourlifewasnevermeanttobeastruggle.com