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January 01, 2004
Good morning Joseth, good morning Roy
All of life is new, just like today. Everyday is New Year's Day. What you bring
with you into the new day, is memory. Imagine how exciting it would be, if you
could wake up each morning without the burden of yesterday's baggage. If you
could wake up and look at your partner and say who is this person. I'm going to
spend the day discovering who she/he is. If you could look at your children for
the first time and re-discover them. It would be the same with your pets, your
friends, your co-workers. What an exciting way to wake up. If you could erase
the memory of the person that did you wrong or forget the event that caused a
difficult situation.
Every day you have an average of 65,000 different thoughts, yet only less than
15% are new thoughts. The rest of it is just old business, that we keep
rehashing. If only we could get rid of that baggage. Your goal should be to
forget, as much of it as possible. Make room for new thoughts, new concepts and
philosophy. It would seem that you have just as much trouble trying to forget as
you do to remembering. How can you change that. How do you forget? It is
possible. You can force it, only to have it re-surface at another time. Or you
change your thoughts about a situation, or circumstance.
For example, it you are consumed with dislike for a person, because they did you
wrong. You will carry that information with you for life. However, if you go
back into your past, and relive the circumstance, with a different thought or
approach, you can change how it affects you. This must be done with a positive
attitude, that you will do what it takes to turn it around without giving into
old thought patterns.
For example, a spouse has cheated on you. You feel hurt, violated, disillusioned
about the sanctity of your relationship. You could never forgive this
transgression, or betrayal of trust. With your now new philosophy of
determination to change your hurt feelings. Go back with openness and
compassion. Do not dwell on the results, but the circumstances that lead up to
the affair. Do not at this time, attach a blame, if this doesn't work out, you
can always go back to your old thoughts about it. Step outside yourself and
watch as a spectator, your life as it unfolds.
Assume for a moment that all parties concerned are good, caring people who do
not go out of their way to hurt others, including yourself. Don't try to justify
anything. Keep your mind open. Don't feel anything at this time. In every
situation there is more than one actor or actress. Both or all of you agree at
some level of consciousness to be in the play and how it will unfold. There has
to be agreement or the play could not continue.
Observe without judgment, the roles each actor plays, including yourself.
Remember you agreed to everything in the script, in order for the play to exist
in the first place. There is no "one" character that is more or less responsible
for the plot or the outcome. Notice all the ways that you contributed to the
play, your spouse may have had the affair, but it was only through your
contribution in the play, that made that possible. Notice the things that you
did, be painfully honest and detached from your emotion. After you have
witnessed how it all worked. As you re-experience the play, your hurt will be
replaced with understanding and compassion.
At this point, you can either accept this change or reject it and continue
living with the hurt, that will be your memory and constant companion. You can
change the past, simply by accepting your new thoughts about it. You can enslave
yourself with it, or set yourself free. You always have free choice, it is
always your choice. You can be a victim of it, or rise above the memory, but
your never hide from it. Memory can be changed and replaced. You are simply
seeing the same event from a different perspective, and creating a new memory,
that is more in harmony with your new thoughts. The mechanics are in place to
change memory. The only thing that will stop you is desire, and the belief that
you can't do it.
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